Summer is over: a bitter rant.

In the past 17 days I have worked 92.6 hours having only the past two days off.

A 15 day week is a steamroller; two days weren't enough to recuperate. 

          I love my job and I am payed well enough, I love the people I work with and the people I work for with all my heart, but if you were to ask if the money was worth it I would probably grunt on my way to the nearest place to lay down. This answer translates to, "Ask me when I have the energy to spend it on something which is likely to be rent and in that case necessary is much more appropriate description than worth it"
I don't live above my means but emotionally I am too tired to be an optimist and that in-and-of itself bums me out. I am, naturally, an energetic lively one who wakes you up before the espresso hits your blood stream. I am currently out of character.

          All of this is to say that I spend an entire winter season serving the 1.3 million people who visit my quaint little mountain town, with a year round population below 7,500 people.
All the while I claim :

"Summer is my favorite time of year"
"This is going to be a restful, rejuvenating summer"
"I'll spend all my weekends camping up by the lakes basin"
"It's just around the corner"

          I've proved myself wrong again and unless I learn more balance I'll become a workaholic hermit who emerges only to make your cappuccino, and no I won't put 3 shots of espresso in it seeing as my machine pulls in incriments of 2. You have a choice of 2 or 4 because it's too good to waste a shot to the pipes. If that was lacking details enough for you to understand I don't want to make you coffee anyway. There's Folgers at Vons, which happens to be the highest grossing Vons store in the entire United States of America.

(I only kind of meant that and it felt good to say, also I will admit I've becme a coffee snob and you're welcome to judge me for it because I wont be offended)

          If summer progresses at the same rate it has been these past two months (which is in fact, fast forward) I must consider my summer over. The only summer I might have is the 2 weeks I have booked to spend split between Chicago, Wayland, Holland, and Traverse City. I also have 18 hours of travel by car which is included only after I have landed at my destination.

Bummer Summer.

I'm retreating. I thought it was just going to be for a few weeks and I could handle spending time hanging out with friends while working so much. Lately I have been realizing that not only do I have the energy for but also, want only  to hang out if it involves movies and wine, or music and chatting (hopefully over a fine 2008 Malbec.) I now understand that I have energy enough for my friends via social media, and Hulu.

----------Now that I have gotten that out of my system----------

I am going to bed
I am going to rest
I am going to choose to smile at myself in the mirror, first thing in the morning

I am going to chose to greet each day as an adventure
I am going to remember to chose to be patient with myself in this season

I am going to chose to learn what it really means to take care of myself and rest
I am going to continually chose to be the best barista I can be
I am going to continually chose to be the most humble and thankful employee I ever have

I am going to chose to invest myself in exactly where I am and what I am doing



We all have choices, steward yourself well.
Chose to be happy.

Aspen grove behind Convict Lake in Mammoth, Lakes CA