I don't care about your religion

I'm not all that concerned with what god you follow or what you think happens after we die in this life.
One thing I know is that almost every religion or sect or group or what ever you want to call yourself can agree on trying to be people of love.

Love endures all things

Give love your own definition (The rest of the wold has and acts as if love were a possession to give away.) I don't know that I have a definition, or a box to put love in and label it but here's what I do know.

Love is patient and kind, it is neither jealous nor arrogant nor rude. Love doesn't brag or seek its own advantage. Love isn't irritable and it doesn't keep a record of complaints. Love isn't happy with injustice but rather is happy with the truth. Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things, hopes for all things and endures all things.

This is what I know of Love and I will be the first to admit that my experience with love has been a limited one.(Only because I believe love to be so vast I would even challenge Homer, Sophocles and Aristophanes to come up with more about love) If I am going to be a person living from love, in a place of love at all times, at least now I have an idea of who I am trying to be.

(a hopeful declaration)
I am patient, kind, humble, respectful, an advocate, consistent, and full of favor. I am a person who seeks the truth, puts up with all things, trusts in all things and hopes for all things. With Love I will endure all things.

With wisdom I will become more.

It Happened Again

The way I forget to remember things is starting to get annoying.
begins the rant.

I am at a Starbucks a few gates from the one I will be boarding through in about half an hour. It's  not my favorite option but I thought a Mocha was a good idea. It wasn't. I also keep forgetting to remember that when I travel, my body likes only water and saltine crackers. Not exactly the gourmet experience you think of when you imagine vacation but I guess there are plenty of other things to enjoy during the "getting there" stage of it all.

I am not ready to go back to California yet. I said good bye to my mom a few days ago and it wasn't enough time. I said goodbye to my dad this morning and my time with him wasn't enough either. I said good bye to my sisters and with them, it's the same story. I don't want to leave. There are a million reasons I love the life I choose to live, including the part where I get to visit my family and my homeland, but leaving my family is not an okay part of it at all. I keep reminding myself of the positives but my heart is still fairly sad.

I am so excited to spend my last few weeks of summer on Crowley Lake, with friends I call my family. I am anxious to get back out rock climbing and back to work. I have a lovely life, I just wish it were closer to Michigan. I am actually looking forward to the final leg of my journey, the 6 hour drive from LA to Mammoth. I love driving.

I love people watching, also. I love writing short stories in my head, one for each person, describing where we all came from and how we came to be here. I stop as soon as I notice myself judging but I usually end up smiling instead of judging, because it warms my heart to see families, people in love, people falling in love with life itself. I usually get a few funny looks for my seemingly pointless smile, but occasionally I giggle to myself because I realize how silly I look and even more occasionally I see someone else smile, or giggle at me as well. Mission accomplished. California, here I come.

whoops.

I had a really great idea for a blog post,
and then I had all my thoughts about the topic while cleaning the patio.
I forgot the whole concept.


at least the patio is clean.

Summer is over: a bitter rant.

In the past 17 days I have worked 92.6 hours having only the past two days off.

A 15 day week is a steamroller; two days weren't enough to recuperate. 

          I love my job and I am payed well enough, I love the people I work with and the people I work for with all my heart, but if you were to ask if the money was worth it I would probably grunt on my way to the nearest place to lay down. This answer translates to, "Ask me when I have the energy to spend it on something which is likely to be rent and in that case necessary is much more appropriate description than worth it"
I don't live above my means but emotionally I am too tired to be an optimist and that in-and-of itself bums me out. I am, naturally, an energetic lively one who wakes you up before the espresso hits your blood stream. I am currently out of character.

          All of this is to say that I spend an entire winter season serving the 1.3 million people who visit my quaint little mountain town, with a year round population below 7,500 people.
All the while I claim :

"Summer is my favorite time of year"
"This is going to be a restful, rejuvenating summer"
"I'll spend all my weekends camping up by the lakes basin"
"It's just around the corner"

          I've proved myself wrong again and unless I learn more balance I'll become a workaholic hermit who emerges only to make your cappuccino, and no I won't put 3 shots of espresso in it seeing as my machine pulls in incriments of 2. You have a choice of 2 or 4 because it's too good to waste a shot to the pipes. If that was lacking details enough for you to understand I don't want to make you coffee anyway. There's Folgers at Vons, which happens to be the highest grossing Vons store in the entire United States of America.

(I only kind of meant that and it felt good to say, also I will admit I've becme a coffee snob and you're welcome to judge me for it because I wont be offended)

          If summer progresses at the same rate it has been these past two months (which is in fact, fast forward) I must consider my summer over. The only summer I might have is the 2 weeks I have booked to spend split between Chicago, Wayland, Holland, and Traverse City. I also have 18 hours of travel by car which is included only after I have landed at my destination.

Bummer Summer.

I'm retreating. I thought it was just going to be for a few weeks and I could handle spending time hanging out with friends while working so much. Lately I have been realizing that not only do I have the energy for but also, want only  to hang out if it involves movies and wine, or music and chatting (hopefully over a fine 2008 Malbec.) I now understand that I have energy enough for my friends via social media, and Hulu.

----------Now that I have gotten that out of my system----------

I am going to bed
I am going to rest
I am going to choose to smile at myself in the mirror, first thing in the morning

I am going to chose to greet each day as an adventure
I am going to remember to chose to be patient with myself in this season

I am going to chose to learn what it really means to take care of myself and rest
I am going to continually chose to be the best barista I can be
I am going to continually chose to be the most humble and thankful employee I ever have

I am going to chose to invest myself in exactly where I am and what I am doing



We all have choices, steward yourself well.
Chose to be happy.

Aspen grove behind Convict Lake in Mammoth, Lakes CA

Tested

I've found myself complaining a bit more so lately than before. I'm not impressing myself, especially when I try to justify it with some circumstantial reasoning.

"Why does it always have to be so hard to:   (Fill in the blank)  "

We are tested because its only under pressure that the truth of who we are comes out.
think back to the last time you got really upset, angry or hurt and if you take a look at what the underlying cause of your response was, you'll begin to understand the stature of your heart.

Open a soda, take a sip and I'm sure it'll taste great. Shake it up a bit first to add some pressure and you wont mistake what is inside the can.

All I mean to say is that even if you aren't  Christian you may understand when one of the apostles writes in the bible to consider it pure joy when you face many trials and tests. This is not some pseudo-sadist comment. Its a note to have a joyful heart because complaining will keep you right where you are. Complaining means your focus is on what you dislike, and where your focus is you will go. Rejoicing and beginning to understand that this pressure and these tests sharpen who you are and force you to stand by the things you have chose for yourself (which are being tested) will take you leaps and bounds beyond the greatness of the person you already are. Keep your head up, heart strong and take your joy with you everywhere you go.
God is bigger than our circumstances.

Intentional community

I love blogging, but sometimes life gets too exciting and fast paced to write about.
It hasn't been all rainbows and butterflies but I've really been enjoying how life has been happening.

One of my recent lessons has been this, that community is essential for living. Not only is is amazing to have friends around in the hard times, but I want friends who will celebrate with me. In this current place I am, friends in celebration might be more important to me than in the hard times. The only thing worse than rain on your parade is when all your friends decide there is something more important than showing up for your parade in the first place.

Also I have learned this. No matter how physically close and convenient your community is, you still have to be intentional. To be honest, myself included, we can all get semi self-centered at times. I live with two other girls and we still have to plan when we get to spend time together. Just because it may not be the most convenient thing of your day, it's worth it.

Here's my personal goal and charge to the rest of you:
In balance with taking care of yourself;
Get up,
Call someone,
Seek them out,
Be intentional about your time with them,
Make plans,
Let them know how much you appreciate them,
Be genuine,
Learn their heart.

You reap what you sew.
Be intentional community.

The extent

          I was almost done typing up the extent of the events from Sweden and Norway. I decided against it. If you want to know some of the specific stories I would be more than happy to tell you all about it; lets get coffee. Here's the basics. We were hugely blessed by one of the elders who is also a local and has been praying for Are and the area for years. She was so blessed by us and what we shared, by what she saw God doing through us that she came back to town a few days later to pray with us.
          We ended up in Hemsedal, Norway after 17 hours traveling via 3 different trains. It was a fun time and on one of our layovers we got to entertain the whole train station with the games we were playing. We were the token, loud Americans. We got to spend a lot of time with the leaders of the Hemsedal Lighthouse for the weekend we got to spend there. They treated us so special and it was so good to be with family. On Saturday we all spoke at mini conference the Lighthouse Hemsedal crew had set up. We taught on worship and prophetic. It was a lot of fun and a strange experience in some ways. The Scandinavian culture is known for being very straight faces. It was interesting to take only ten minutes and share my heart on a lifestyle of worship with out seeing a single smile, nod, or even disagreeing look. Nothing. When we were all done and were breaking for lunch I, as well as others in the group, had at least one if not more people come thank us for sharing. They let us know their thoughts on everything and it was strange because I would have never guessed it from their expressions. God really showed up and opened doors, hearts and minds for the message He had given us for Norway. We really got to bless the core group, Havard and his wife Elisabeth who are heading up with the Lighthouse, as well as Maria and G. The family dynamic was amazing and one of my first few experiences with introductions to Lighthouse family. I was blown away by how much it felt like home.
          God was doing a work in me of family before I even met the people. The sun had set minutes after we got on our long train ride to Hemsedal but there was something familiar about the hills we were traveling through. I had never been there before this trip and somehow it was as if I had taken that train ride many times. Home is where the heart is and I had spent some time praying for the family and the area, and at the moment this strange country felt like home, my spirit knew they had been praying for us as  well. Our hearts and spirits had been in the same place for a while and we were all home.